February 9th — Hard week. Moms aren’t supposed to get “sick” or need to go to the doctor. My health issues wait for no one, not even a five-year-old with a bad cold. Daniel is sick and home from school this week but my radiation continues. While I’m sure it would be frowned upon for me to take a 5-year-old to radiation, I know it’s a no-no to take a sick preschooler to the oncology building. This is why 40 somethings with small children aren’t supposed to get cancer. It’s inconvenient. Among other things. Sigh. So, I’m juggling childcare issues relying on my brother and Greg and neighbors to step in and help out. I guess this is when I call in the chips from all the folks who have volunteered to help me. However, no one with small children at home wants to watch a sick, snotty kid. Not only do I have daily radiation this week, I have an echocardiogram today, my Herceptin chemo on Thursday and my ob/gyn wants to see me on Wednesday. She’s going out of town to Mardi Gras on Thursday and wants to verify I’m not already in menopause before my oncologist shuts down my ovaries with a shot on Thursday. The only bright spot is that my ob/gyn called me last night and thinks any “symptoms” of estrogen I’m having might just be my body’s regular response to chemo-induced menopause. I told her I wasn’t having hot flashes or any other menopausal symptoms and she said I might just be lucky and still be in chemical menopause. That’s actually great news. First, that my estrogen levels might not be dangerously healthy for cancer growth and second that I don’t seem to be having bad menopausal symptoms. On another note, I’ve been quite troubled by my lack of intelligence in completing basic tasks since I’ve had chemo. I read that chemo drops your IQ by 10 percent. Since I know my IQ from high school (I’m sure childrearing and vodka martinis have lowered it since then), I told Greg he’d have to get used to a dumber wife and gave him my new IQ number. Greg paused and said, “really? that seems high to me…are you sure the study said the IQ drop was only 10 percent?” Someone come slap that funny man for me.